Reassembled
by Stalker of Stories
Summary: Slash Sirius/Remus written for the 50 Phrases Challenge on HPFC. Follows from their first meeting to the Shrieking Shack. 45 short chapters
1. Chapter 1

Warnings: Slash (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is #17 "Do we know each other?"

Chapter 1

Remus Lupin was many things, but among them normal could not be counted. He was an eleven year old wizard, a very rare thing given that magical humans made up only two percent of the Earth's population. What was often considered more important was the fact that he was _not_ human by Ministry definition; he was a werewolf. As such, Remus had expected his wizard status to be completely overlooked in favor of his dark creature status in every aspect of his life.

Needless to say, he was still in a state of shock as he went shopping in Flourish & Blotts for school texts that he would be using at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry three days after opening his acceptance letter.

It was with mechanical precision that Remus plucked A Standard Book of Spells (Grade 1) by Miranda Goshawk from the Charms section shelves. _I'll be learning _magic_ with this book_, he thought as he cradled the tome in his hand as if it were a sacred thing. To Remus, there was no question that it _was_.

"Budge up, would you?"

Remus jumped, clutching the book to his chest. When he turned to look at the speaker, Remus found a boy, likely his age or perhaps older. Other than the excited light in their eyes, these two boys could be seen as different as night and day. Remus' hair was just a shade darker than a standard light brown while the boy had hair as black as night. Gold eyes stared from a sickly pale face to meet a strange pair of blue-gray set in a healthy tan complexion. Remus was the everyday, run-of-the-mill eleven year old werewolf in second-hand clothes; this boy looked like a little lord.

"Come on, I need to get one of those Charms books too, y'know!" The boy had a very light voice, full of laughter.

Remus moved hastily out of the other first year's way, allowing him to snatch a text from the shelf with little care. It was dumped in a plastic basket containing other first year books. As if he was bored by the mere thought of the sacred books, something Remus could not understand in the least.

"What books have you picked up so far?" The boy asked, though he didn't wait for an answer. "I'm just going straight down the list. My mother is with Father at the front, and my younger brother _Regulus_," the tone with which he said that name didn't sound friendly, "is either with them or slinking about in the History section. He's a right bore, y'know? Let's go to the Potions section next. I've heard that muggles have their own kind of potions called Kemi's Tree. What _trees_ have to do with anything, I don't know. Potions should be alright though, making cauldrons explode and all that, but I'm looking forward to Care of Magical Creatures in third year. I'll probably get straight Os in Astronomy and – am I boring you?"

Remus was horrified that the other boy might think so; he was just having trouble keeping up and couldn't believe _anyone_ was talking to _him_! "N-no! It's just, I mean... do we know each other?" At the blank look on the other boy's face, Remus elaborated. "It's just that you're being terribly familiar, and I don't even know your name."

"Oh," the boy broke out into a grin and thrust out a hand. "Sirius, Sirius Black."

"Remus Lupin," he took Sirius' hand gingerly and shook, pounding his brain. He'd heard the name Black somewhere before, but where? It wasn't a common name – nor an uncommon one really – but it had to be a wizarding name. Remus didn't know very many people to begin with.

"Then we know each other! Now come on!" Sirius continued grinning with a look in his eye that was completely unfamiliar to the gold-eyed boy. Suddenly, his arm was grabbed up and Sirius dragged Remus to the Potions section without further ado.

When Remus met his parents at the register, he told them in a slightly disbelieving voice that he had made a friend.

Sirius told his parents that he made an ally, but he secretly thought of Remus as his friend.

**Author's Note: Been a while since I've written any challenges, and I've never done Sirius/Remus before, so we'll see how this goes :D Haven't posted anything Harry Potter related in over a month either. There will be 45 chapters as some chapters will use two quotes instead of just one.**

**Hopefully, this will get rid of my writer's block.**


	2. Chapter 2

Warnings: Slash (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 40 "Do I get to find out what this is for?" "No, it's embarrassing."

Chapter 2

He was disappointed to find that he _couldn't_ find the golden-eyed Remus Lupin. Sirius had scoured the Hogwarts Express before giving up and sat with another first year boy by the name of James Potter. They hit it off immediately. Sirius forgot about Remus for a few hours and made fun of a greasy-haired boy with James' help, though a red-haired girl got mad at them for it.

His faith in his family was shaken. Sirius had never been a _proper_ Black as his mother – Walburga Black was a Black by birth, the first cousin of her own husband, Orion Black – had oft told him. However, even as James piled abuse on Slytherin, the House that Sirius was told he _had_ to be Sorted into (though Ravenclaw would be acceptable, it was unlikely), the House nearly every Black had been in for six centuries, since the family migrated to Britain from Italy during the Renaissance, Sirius knew it wasn't all true.

If all Slytherins were evil, why did the House even exist? Besides, you couldn't tell if someone was evil from age _eleven_, magical talking hat or no; that was just stupid!

But James _was_ right, to an extent. Sirius was surely not meant to be in Slytherin if his personality was any indication (which it was supposed to be). He thought again of Remus and knew that by their sole encounter his friend wouldn't be in Slytherin. Maybe Ravenclaw or Gryffindor? Gryffindor would be at least marginally acceptable to his family, Sirius thought, since it was for those who "stood out" and had courage. Hopefully that would be good enough.

In the boats up to school, Sirius _did_ find Remus, pale-faced and excited. Sirius was quick to force his oldest friend (two weeks) into the boat that he and James were taking and was happy to introduce both of his friends to one another. All of his friends would know one another, no matter who he befriended or what House they ended up in.

The fact that Remus seemed so _surprised_ by the introduction... maybe he was like Sirius. Maybe he hadn't ever had a friend either? Sirius decided that he and Remus would learn how to make, have, and be friends together, even if Remus ended up in Hufflepuff or Ravenclaw or anywhere else. Sirius was already determined to be in Gryffindor with James, and decided it was the best place for him. He wasn't ambitious or sly, he wanted to be _seen_. His mother said that Slytherins ran the world from the shadows; Sirius wanted to be right up front.

He didn't feel the least bit uncomfortable standing in front of the entire school, waiting to be Sorted, nor when he was the first student called.

"Black, Sirius!" The Deputy Headmistress, Minerva McGonagall, called out to the Great Hall. Sirius sprang forward excitedly from his place between James and Remus – one preening under the school's attention and giving him a pat on the back, the other nervous and shuffling his feet, though he gave Sirius a tentative smile that sparked a grin – to lounge on the hard wooden stool. The Sorting Hat dropping over his head kept him from seeing the rest of the room.

_'Another Black, I see,'_ the Hat murmured in his mind. Of course another Black! This Hat must have sorted every Black for six centuries, never mind Bellatrix and Narcissa who were attending and just so happened to be sitting at the Slytherin table. _'Yes, that is true. Walburga and Orion's son, and not a thing like your mother, though you're also a far cry from your father. You're a logical one! Rare from a pureblood. Yes, you've a rich mind, though you haven't the drive to do in-depth research or use knowledge to bring you forward. Indecision clouds your mind between loyalty to your family and newfound friends... and you are quite loyal. But I know an extrovert and trouble maker's mind when I see it. Yes, I'd say you belong to...'_

"GRYFFINDOR!"

The Hall was silent but for two cheering first years standing in line – one a boisterous holler, the other clapping quietly – before tentative clapping came from the table furthest from the door. Sirius was a Black, and as a Black he had been figured as a Slytherin long before he entered Hogwarts. The jaunty wave he sent to Bellatrix and Narcissa at the green laden table on the side of the room opposite his own table left a few students gobsmacked.

As the Sorting progressed, first Remus and then James joined him at the Gryffindor table. They tucked in to dinner before talking with their fellow first year Gryffindors – including the girl who was mad at them for picking on the greasy-haired Slytherin boy – about anything and everything. James seemed surprised to hear that his mother, Dorea Potter nee Black, was a cousin of Sirius' grandmother, which made James count as a Black generation ahead of Sirius.

By the end, Sirius was even more assured that James and Remus were his friends, and he was perfectly contented with the walk to Gryffindor tower. Their other dorm mate, Peter Pettigrew, hadn't spoken much, but Sirius was sure that with time they could all be great friends.

At roughly nine o'clock, the Gryffindor boys could all be found unpacking their belongings, at least enough to get their books out for tomorrow and whatever pajamas they needed for the night. Sirius, however, noticed a very curious object in Remus' trunk and didn't hesitate to pull it out, inspecting it.

Why would Remus have a _muzzle_?

Of course, Remus snatched it back hastily.

"Do I get to find out what this is for?" Sirius wasn't entirely sure he wanted to know, but then again... he really did.

"No, it's embarrassing."

Which meant Sirius _had_ to find out eventually. But he could wait.

After all, he had seven years to find out everything about his dorm mates, and to an eleven year old, that's all the time in the world.

**Author's Note: That's the second installment. Kinda surprised I broke the thousand-word mark on this one. Mind, these chapters seem painfully short to me, but it's all to entice my muse into giving me inspiration for Imminence.**


	3. Chapter 3

Warnings: Slash (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 43 "When God gives you lemons, find a new God!"

Chapter 3

According to James, Sirius was expecting a howler. Remus wasn't too fond of the idea; his father had received a howler from Remus' grandmother after the attack by Fenrir Greyback. Howlers were noisy and embarrassing. Sirius didn't think he would get a howler though, and he didn't.

The reasons he gave made sense to Remus. Even if his family did disapprove – which, after reading the letter they sent, it was found that they did – they were a Slytherin family. They wouldn't do something as obvious as sending a howler; they had far more subtle ways of making their son hurt, and Remus could smell right off the bat that they succeeded. Sirius didn't let on, but Remus could tell that whatever his parents said hadn't been good.

James seemed to have caught on as well, because that night found Remus and Sirius camped out on James' bed, learning the plan for a prank. Peter was proud to be recruited as their look-out, and they had no trouble in executing the daring act (aside from getting lost on the way to lunch). Remus was tentative about breaking the rules, but he could smell that it made Sirius feel better.

Since Sirius and James were his first friends, Remus couldn't even conceive of putting his comfort before their happiness. He didn't protest to dumping a prank sweet of James' into the goblet of a random Slytherin as they walked into lunch, nor did he let on that he _knew_ Sirius had spread grease on the Hufflepuff benches during break that morning. Never mind James' own addition of sending all the school owls to the Ravenclaw table, which took a lot less effort than one might think.

No, in the end it was Peter's fault that they were implicated for the crime. No one held this against him, as it had been pretty stupid of them to not prank Gryffindor too. Remus found himself wedged between the mousy boy and their momentary-leader when the four boys were all set to detention that night with Professor Slughorn.

The second years needed lemon juice for some cleaning potions they were going to brew the next day, and the Gryffindors were set to juice the lemons for them.

And they were a _lot_ of lemons.

Not for the first time that evening, Remus scrunched up his nose at the sensation of pulp getting stuck under his fingernails. By now he smelled like a bottle of Magical Mess Remover, not that he could tell for all the juice that he squirted in the air from their collective effort. His nose burned from the scent of citric acid... and the fact that he had been squirted up the nose by an unfortunate squeezing by Peter.

"Gods, this _sucks_!" Sirius bemoaned as he rubbed his sleepy eyes on his sleeve rather than risk getting lemon in them. Remus was pretty sure he was just being dramatic since he hadn't been the least bit down from receiving the detention. "I don't think I'll be able to look at a lemon ever again." Then he repeated himself. "_Gods_ this sucks."

It struck Remus that it was strange to hear a wizard referring to any deity. Growing up a half-blood werewolf in a muggle town, he was used to hearing muggles swear to the Christian deity (not that he knew much about any muggle faith), or one of the traditional pagan deities even, but he had never actually heard a pureblood say something like that. It was kind of funny, but he supposed Sirius hadn't fit any stereotypes to begin with.

James grinned from his side of the cauldron they were juicing into. "If God gives you lemons, find a new God," he scoffed in a well-meaning way. "I prefer oranges to lemons anyway."

Sirius dropped his lemon – rind and all – into the cauldron. Remus rolled his eyes but laughed anyway while Peter gave over to nervous chuckles. There were better and worse jokes out there, the young lycanthrope supposed, but it certainly wasn't a _good_ joke.

That was the first prank, and it was _far_ from the last.

**Author's Note: Meh, not the best thing I've ever written, none of this is, but we'll see. Still not inspired... we'll see.  
**


	4. Chapter 4

Warnings: Slash (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 3 "Stop drooling on me. You are not a dog, last time I checked."

Chapter 4

It was a year and three months after becoming friends with Remus that his friends all became aware of certain circumstances. Sirius had been suspicious about Remus' sickly appearance, why he was never _actually_ sick until he left to visit his "sick aunt" back home each month. As the second to oldest of the Gryffindor foursome – James being the youngest and Peter the oldest – was the one to figure it out two months earlier, Sirius couldn't be an less proud of himself.

After all, he now knew why Remus had brought am muzzle to school.

To be fair, he didn't figure it out wholly on his own. He had his mother to thank for the success; she spent the summer drilling knowledge on dark creatures into his mind. It was harder to ignore the obvious signs with those facts stuffed into his head.

It was especially hard to ignore that he found Remus in a hospital bed on the morning after the full moon. He spent two more months agonizing over whether he should confront Remus about it or tell James and Peter, at which point James found out and accidentally blurted it to the other two friends.

Sirius realized, belatedly, that he should have schooled his features to surprise, but it was too late.

"Sirius, did you know?" He couldn't deny James' question and instead shrugged. James seemed torn before he spoke again. "I mean, I guess I can see why you wouldn't say anything but what... I mean _why_..." For once, James Potter didn't know what to say.

"I wanted to talk to Remus about it before I said anything," Sirius immediately sent James and Peter hard looks from his bed. "I don't care what either or you think, but I'm not going to turn on him for anything. Remus is my friend for better or for worse, got it? And I'm going to be behind him one-hundred percent." He dared them to contradict him without saying it, and by the nervous fidgeting of Peter, he thought it would be the mousy boy he had to worry about.

Strangely, it ended up being James who was most insecure about the whole thing. Sirius spent a good hour coaxing him out of the prejudice that was bred into all wizards – muggle born, half blood, pure blood, blood traitor, they all had this particular prejudice beat into them from the moment they set foot in the wizarding world – before James conceded that being a werewolf didn't make Remus any less their friend. And Peter... well, he trusted his friends to a fault, and Sirius knew that with the "front men" of the quartet okay, he would be too. It was just a matter of time.

But the question came of how they could help their lycanthropic friend. None of them were particularly good at Potions – the only real scholastic failure of their particular dorm – so they couldn't exactly aspire to finding a cure. Sirius and James would fund the companies _trying_ to create a cure, but they could do little else on that front. The only thing they could think of was to somehow ease Remus' transformations.

How? It was simple... well, not simple actually, because it would take them years to accomplish, but all three boys were soon determined. Peter mentioned that animals couldn't be turned into werewolves, and then James made the connection of animagus forms being used to stop infection. All they had to do was smuggle books from the restricted section of the library and learn to be animagi.

When Remus returned to the room that night, he had no idea his friends knew about his condition, nor that they had already started trying to become animagi. The first step was to find out what they were, and none of them were too displeased. Sirius thought his form, that of an adolescent Black Lab/Great Dane/German Sheppard mix puppy, was amazing, and laughed at the gangly legs of James' stag. Even Peter immediately caught how useful a rat form would be for snooping around.

And Remus had chocolate when he came in, so naturally Sirius was all over him.

"Stop drooling on me," Remus rolled his eyes, waving his arms away from his body to keep the chocolate from Sirius. Okay, so Sirius had canine animagus form; didn't mean he couldn't have chocolate now, when he had no clue on how to transform! "You are not a dog, last time I checked."

"He will be eventually though!" James chuckled and swiped the candy, to which Sirius set to trying to grab it from the dark-haired pre-teen like... well, like an excited puppy. But it was _chocolate_!

"What do you mean?"

"We're going to become animagi and spend full moons with you."

Sirius was pleased to find Remus incapable of forming a coherent argument as he snagged the chocolate bar from James and calmly split the yummy spoils of war among his friends.

Today one Milka bar, tomorrow the chocolate frog factory!

**Author's Note: Note to self – never give Sirius Kiddy Crack (candy). It leads only to tears... well, and insane amounts of laughter and pranks... okay, he can have Kiddy Crack. Just not Kitty Crack; it may keep away the mosquitoes, but can you imagine how much he would torment all the cats at Hogwarts?**

**Writer's block still present... but I now have Writer's Workshop, Psychology, and Art :D So I kinda win.**


	5. Chapter 5

Warnings: Slash (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 5 "Will you marry me?"

Chapter 5

It was a fairly simple adventure that led to James Charlus Potter falling for Lily Gretal Evans. Remus found it absolutely hilarious that James liked her, his opposite number in nearly every respect, but kept the humor of the situation to himself.

Lily had slapped James, it was as simple as that. James had been playing a prank on the Slytherins despite Remus and Sirius telling him not to single out one house, particularly that one, but it did no good as always. Severus Snape bore the brunt of the prank and had to spend the night with Madame Pomfrey in the Hostpital Wing. As he was the best (not to mention only male) friend of Lily, it made sense that she would angry about his captivity by the matron.

Remus wouldn't have protected James from her wrath if he could have.

The prankster in question had the strangest look on his face that evening as the four friends sat in the common room working on Care of Magical Creatures homework. Remus kept sending James sidelong glances, but he was oblivious.

"I think she knocked his brain loose," Sirius snickered. "What little was left of it, I mean." Remus snorted, shaking his head at the antics of his friend, but didn't respond. If James didn't snap out of it soon, there wouldn't be any time for the non-lycanthropic members of the group to practice their animagus transformations.

Suddenly, James was up and out of his chair. Remus could only watch in horror as he approached Lily with a purpose to his stride. He wouldn't hit her back, would he? Remus had been raised polite, and the idea of hitting a _girl_... the werewolf was already getting up to stop his idiotic friend.

Until James' own legs stopped and dropped him into a kneeling pose that might be dashing for someone more than thirteen years old.

"Will you marry me?"

The resounding slap and amused laughter from the upper years must have been heard throughout the whole castle.

**Author's Note: Okay, that's 5 chapters down, 40 more to go... I can do this. Writer's Workshop, if nothing else, gives me time to write these little things down in my notebook. Still have writer's block though.**


	6. Chapter 6

Warnings: Slash (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 1 "You look like a banana."

Chapter 6

It had already been two weeks since The Slap Heard Throughout the Castle, and James hadn't quit it yet. As funny as Sirius – not to mention all the upper years and younger kids and really everyone in the school aside from Lily and Snape and some of the teachers – found the idea of a thirteen year old boy trying to woo a newly fourteen year old girl, it was getting a little old. Sirius took to hanging out with Remus when James was being unreasonable and/or plotting to in Lily's heart. At least the werewolf had the right idea to hide in the library from their bespectacled compatriot.

Even as they sat in the Gryffindor stands for the Gryffindor versus Hufflepuff Quidditch Match, which was the semi-final match, Sirius was getting further exasperated by James' antics. As the newest of Gryffindor's chasers, he was getting a lot of attention and took great pride in utilizing it for a nefarious purpose.

With his suddenly extended vocabulary, Sirius wondered if he wasn't spending too much time alone with Remus and the books.

James pulled loop-de-loops and other maneuvers that made Sirius queasy to think if... and they sort of reminded him of an aerial ballet his father had taken the family to that summer. Except that the ballet didn't feature Sirius' thirteen year old friend trailing a giant incorporeal sign that bore the legend "Lily, marry me?"

Lily hadn't been too happy, needless to day.

Meanwhile, Peter trash-talked the Hufflepuff team as they flew by the Gryffindor stands. Sirius couldn't keep from laughing at some of the taunts. His personal favorite?

"You look like a banana!"

Hogwarts continued to entertain.

**Author's Note: And that's all I did in writer's workshop today (chapters 5 and 6). I'll probably get a couple more chapters out today or tomorrow. And the writer's block? Still there. Oh where art thou, my Juusanbi no Usagi (13-tailed bunny)? My Naru-muse has left me :(**


	7. Chapter 7

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 14 "Urgh. That's absolutely the most repulsing thing I have ever seen."

Chapter 7

Remus woke slowly, surprising himself as each movement failed to produce the usual aches and pains, how he could arch his back without fear that he had given himself a deep gash to reopen. He took great joy in his new found ability to stretch every muscle in his body as he lay on what felt like a moth-eaten mattress, some sort of cloth covering his naked flesh. It was so strange... so _lovely_ to be able to move the morning after the full moon.

He let out a happy low moan and snuggled back into the bed, studiously ignoring the giggles that had erupted during his near-feline bout of stretching. He was too happy being whole and warm to be embarrassed. He had bigger problems than that if he cared to think about it.

It hadn't taken long into fourth year for Remus to realize he preferred wizards to witches, and unlike the werewolf thing, he didn't hide that from his friends. At least it had shut James up for a while as he decided to turn his romantic plots for Lily (and malicious ones that targeted his only real rival in love, Snape) in Remus' favor, to get him a boyfriend. Much as he appreciated the effort, the wolf in lion's clothing had been annoyed all that year.

Being a werewolf sucked. Being a _gay_ werewolf wasn't much worse. Now, after his first full moon out with Padfoot, Prongs, and Wormtail, he thought the first was rather a lot better now, so the latter was his problem.

And he bloody well refused to let his "furry little problem" change into some pet name for his pecker rather than his medical condition. So the idea of letting his snickering friends know he had some atypical morning wood was completely out of the question. The teasing would _never stop_.

Though he couldn't help but squeak like a certain rat animagus when Sirius – in his Grim form as Remus had christened the mutt – jumped up onto his back. The large dog, not even full grown yet, placed its paws so that it was almost straddling its lupine victim and seemed to take great joy in licking the exposed upper back and neck in one great stripe. Remus couldn't hold back a yelp of disgust and slapped his hand to his neck.

Well, that was one way to tame the mini-wolf, at least.

"Urgh," Remus shuddered, shoving Sirius away and sitting up. His "blanket" was apparently Sirius' robe, which now pooled around his lower body. He pulled the hand he'd been using to wipe away the spit and grimaced at the sheer _amount_ of slobber. "That is absolutely the most repulsive thing I've ever seen."

He took great joy in wiping the spit off on Sirius' robe, not that he'd let on, and regaled in the plaintive woof that came from the dog animagus.

"Well done Messer Moony; we look forward to many future nights gallivanting through this shack," James took a grand bow, and pulled his invisibility cloak from his pocket. "Move it along flea bag! Pomfrey comes at dawn, and we have about ten minutes... though you might want to get your cloak too..."

At the laughter ensuing from Padfoot snagging the cloak in his mouth and playing tug-o-war with Remus – who, as it just so happened, had enough modesty to not give his friends an eye-full when he was still half-hard – a bright flush made its way to Remus' face.

Of course, so did a large grin. He had such good friends.

**Author's Note: 'Kay, so that's seven... and I'm still going strong! Ish... anyway, working on it. We'll see.**


	8. Chapter 8

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 16 "Bloody hell it's dark... ow! That was my _foot_!"

Chapter 8

Sirius hopped happily beside his friends as they explored the school. It was the middle of the night – around three in the morning last he checked – and he couldn't help but wonder how they had convinced Remus to come this time. The werewolf had been vicious about it – he flailed, cursed, and even hexed James' hair pink before settling down.

Or, rather, Sirius forced him to settle down by grabbing him around the waist. After that, Remus had come quietly, only giving cursory arguments and generally staying as far from Sirius as he could, even going so far as to keep Peter perpetually between them.

It occurred to the canine animagus that he should probably be more concerned with Remus avoiding him than anything else. After all, they _were_ best friends.

They moved further into the inner bowels of the castle, away from the windows, and it took a moment for Sirius to recall that it was _his_ job to light their way. Well, he didn't so much recall as James reminded him.

"Bloody hell it's dark," James' voice came from a bit to Sirius right. "Ow! That was my _foot_! Sirius, turn a bloody light on!" Which, of course, he did, and Peter proceeded to apologize profusely for his blunder in the dark. Remus sighed and pulled at Sirius' collar, urging the group on.

They had a mission, after all. The night before, Sirius had been wandering the halls in his animagus form and sniffed out a secret passage. Tonight, they were finding out where it led tonight, hopefully out of the castle, though it was doubtful. If nothing else they might have found a shortcut to the Transfiguration room... or even just a quiet place to snog.

Snogging sounded good, but without a worthy partner, it was just boring. Sirius hadn't snogged a girl in _days_; hell, he'd probably even play tonsil-quidditch with a bloke at this point!

Sirius wouldn't have realized he was thinking out loud if Remus hadn't choked.

"Ah, don't be such a prude, Remus," Sirius snickered. He had nothing against blokes – he considered himself bisexual on occasion after all, though he did tend to lean more towards the female end of the spectrum – and he knew Remus didn't mind blokes (one night the werewolf forgot to use a silencing charm, and well...), so it was no big deal. It wasn't like he wanted to snog Remus or anything anyway. "We still need to find you a bloke come to think of it. Maybe the hunch-backed witch can be your secret spot with him!"

James, of course, smacked him upside the head. "Down Fido," he scoffed at the canine. "I say it'll lead somewhere, so no pegging it as a place for a good shag yet, okay?"

As it turned out, it was a good thing Sirius didn't peg it as a snogging-ground. He doubted people in Honeyduke's would want to hear ragged pants and happy screams when the door to the cellar was opened.

**Author's Note: Still writer's blocked, but I'm working on it. Working on this... whatever. And teenagers have dirty minds; they can make anything into innuendo. Don't be surprised at how much there is in this story, okay?**


	9. Chapter 9

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quotes used are number 34 "It's dark out and... we are wearing sunglasses. Care to explain?" and number 36 "It's an eclipse."

Chapter 9

Sirius needed to get his mind off of something. It was obvious – very obvious in fact – to the lycanthrope that Sirius was having some issue, though what exactly it was remained to be seen. The Marauders were halfway into their fifth year at Hogwarts, had been enjoying full moons together for four months now, and ever since the Christmas break, Sirius hadn't been quite right.

It wasn't anything noticeable to most people. He was still flirting with anything on two legs, or three for that matter, still bouncy and loud, but Remus knew his friends far too well for that to fly. Sirius was hiding something, and it probably had to do with his family.

By now, Remus might have been worrying about OWLs, telling his friends to do at least _some_ preparation so it wouldn't all be last minute cramming, but he didn't care to drag down the mood. James was morning his latest rejection by Lily – they were occurring nearly daily now – while Peter was off somewhere doing something with his girlfriend (a rather plain Ravenclaw by the name of Marlene McKinnon, though given her endowments Remus supposed he could see the attraction). James was best left to brood, but Sirius...

Remus didn't really know how to deal with a depressed Sirius; simply put, the canine animagus didn't _get_ depressed! It didn't happen, but now it had and the only thing Remus could think of was dragging Sirius along with him for his own rare rule breaking.

Sure, he was a prefect, but no one was _perfect_. He had snuck out for a snog before (even if he didn't seem the type, Remus knew he wasn't bad looking, and he'd met a few boys in Ravenclaw who were up for a grope in a broom cupboard), played pranks, the whole shebang. For some reason, Sirius was _surprised_ that he was initiating anything.

"Reeeemuuuuus!" Sirius whined in away completely different from how he could in canine form. "Where are you taking me?" He was pouting – and Merlin only knew that no one could beat Sirius when it came to a puppy-dog stare – but Remus didn't give in.

Much.

"I'll give you a hint," of course, they were already in the Entrance Hall, heading for the front doors, so Sirius would already know they were going outside. So he waited to give the hint until they got out, and pulled the hint from his pocket. Two pair.

With the sunglasses slipped onto both their faces, Remus could only assume Sirius was giving him a funny look. Though the combination of it being the middle of the night and the obstruction of sunglasses, he couldn't actually tell. But he had a feeling that Sirius was looking at him strangely anyways.

"It's dark out and..." Sirius dragged out a dramatic silence, "we are wearing sunglasses." His ability to state the obvious was paralleled only by Remus' other friends. "Care to explain?"

In response, he simply redirected Sirius' attention to the only bright object in sight; the moon, waxing gibbous, though still far enough from full for Remus to not feel ill, shone a deep, bloody red in the sky. It was considered an ominous sign, but Remus knew better; if there was anything to know about the moon, he knew it after all.

"It's an eclipse."

Sirius didn't speak again, but Remus could hear him drop down to sit on the stone steps. Remus joined him and simply looked at the red near-orb that would in four days time be brilliant, white, and herald the next adventure of the Marauders.

The red seeped slowly away as the moon moved in the sky. Sirius didn't say anything, and Remus didn't urge him too; Sirius needed something, and until he knew what, this was all he could do.

"My parents are supporting the Dark Lord," Remus almost jumped at this declaration. Of course he knew about the Dark Lord Voldemort; everyone had. His attacks had started up when Remus and Sirius were in first year, and they were escalating, slowly but surely.

Remus didn't respond verbally, instead gripping Sirius' shoulder, letting his friend know that he was there.

"Mum... she won't really join up, it's all financial, but they're still helping," he sighed deeply. "She wants me to stop hanging about with 'half-bloods and blood traitors' and be more like Regulus. Dad didn't even seem to care."

They stayed silently on the step for another ten minutes before ducking back inside. The rest of Gryffindor was in bed when they returned, and Remus gave Sirius a quick, reassuring hug before going off to his bed.

For some reason, his mind lingered more on the hug as he drifted off than Sirius' family problems.

**Author's Note: Yeah, nice little fluffy scene between Remus and Sirius. Still Naruto-blocked, not that you lot care. 1/5 done with this story though, so that's kinda cool.**


	10. Chapter 10

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 35 "Some people say such awful things."

Chapter 10

Sometimes, Sirius reflected, he wondered just how well he had his family figured out. Over Christmas, he had been told that they wanted him to work for the Dark Lord. Well, his mother wanted him to; his father was easily steam-rolled by his wife in everything and was rather apathetic regarding the whole thing. When Sirius refused, his mother had gone on some screeching tirade, but he didn't care.

He wasn't going to be a murderer, and if that was what his mother expected of him, then she could go suck a lemon.

Perhaps he shouldn't have been surprised when Remus tried to comfort him, when no one else had noticed his attitude. But he still was surprised, and he appreciated the gesture.

Besides, that Remus would share that view with him... it was kinda special.

Unable to concentrate, Sirius sighed and closed the Transfiguration text book he was supposed to be studying from. That was months ago, all the way back in January, and now it was May. And he was still thinking about the strange serenity of that blood red moon. Remus and James had turned 16 since then, and it was less than a year now until they would all be of age, able to do whatever they liked.

Yet he couldn't stop thinking of watching the moon with Remus – who, by all rights, should have hated anything to do with the lunar cycle – and how utterly calm he had felt.

"Staring at the cover of your text book isn't going to somehow osmose the knowledge inside your head," Remus' voice came from his left, and Sirius twitched, ever so slightly. "Something on your mind?"

"No." It was blunt, and a lie, but Sirius didn't care. Remus obviously did – he could probably smell it so close to the full moon – but he said nothing further.

"Well, you can always talk to us, Sirius," he nodded at Remus' words, but kept silent.

"James Charlus Potter, if you so much as _look_ at me again, I'll hex you so hard your _children_ will be feeling it!" The monotony of Sirius' thoughts was broken by an enraged yell from Lily Evans.

"But -"

"Fuck off!"

There was, not for the first time – and certainly not the last – a loud slap resounding from the corner where James was harassing Lily.

It was Peter who broke the following silence. "Some people say such awful things."

**Author's Note: Sorta sorry for not updating yesterday, but I did post a Naruto one-shot - Gai/Fem!Kakashi if anyone is interested, it's actually pretty good - so nyaa. I'm gonna go finish chapter 11; will post it later today.**


	11. Chapter 11

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 9 "It's okay. It was only a dream – I'm here."

Chapter 11

Remus woke up with a wince. Judging by the light, it was still the middle of the night. By the sounds, someone in the room had forgotten to use a silencing charm – the exact timber of the noises being made led him to believe that it was James – while the scent suggested a wet dream. Not when, how, or to what Remus would have liked to wake to.

Unfortunately, they were only allowed to place one-way silencing charms on their beds, and weak ones. Due to the whole Voldemort-thing, they couldn't just fully silence their canopies, in case there was an attack and Dumbledore had to wake everyone up with the PA spell. If someone snuck in and attacked a roommate, they had to be able to hear so they could help and/or escape.

It was one of very few of Professor McGonagall's rules that the Marauders stuck to.

Unfortunately, it meant that if one of the three animagi forgot to charm their curtains, Remus had to deal with certain noises that he didn't want to think about his roommates making. He was gay – this was an established fact – but he didn't want to think about his three best friends (all of whom were heterosexual) in that way.

The whole "I can hear and smell you when you wank" thing made it a bit harder for him, but Remus refused to let his mind wander any further beyond "annoyed." On the downside, Remus had a vivid imagination due to playing alone all his childhood.

A particularly loud moan made him stuff his head under a pillow, but it didn't help.

Another minute of fast breathing and quick moans and Remus heard the end of James' dream. It happened to wake the boy in question as well, and James cleaned up before going back to sleep.

The Gryffindor lycanthrope wasn't so lucky and had a hard time considering the scent of sex still lingered in the air. With only three days having passed since the last full moon, his senses were still too sharp.

A low, canine whimper permeated the room. At first, Remus thought it was his own, but he quickly realized that there were more such noises, more human, and they definitely weren't coming from him. And these moans and shufflings were a _lot_ less happy than James' dream had been.

Directional hearing helped Remus discern that these unhappy sleep-sounds were coming from the bed on his direct left – Sirius', unsurprisingly. These early stages of nightmare had Remus out of bed before he could really think, padding quietly across the cold stone floor, though he winced at the chill that attacked his body. All the Marauders – and, indeed, Gryffindor boys in general – tended to wear only boxers or occasionally sleep pants to bed, so Remus had to admit himself chilled.

His friends were more important than his self-comfort though, always had been, so he made his way quickly to Sirius' bed. The scent of panic was already rising up, fear as well, and there was no time to be easy. Remus plopped down on Sirius' bed and shook him awake.

Sitting so suddenly upright that he almost hit Remus' jaw, the glisten of sweat under the waning gibbous moon was quite noticeable. Any thoughts that might stem at the thought of Sirius' body, which was quite a nice one, were brushed easily aside.

"It's okay," Remus kept his voice low and soothing. "It was only a dream. I'm here." The latter was a reminder that he had given Sirius so many times since finding out what the Blacks wanted for their eldest son, but Sirius had yet to take him up on it.

Sirius just gave him this _look_, like he was some sort of kicked puppy, before lying back in his bed and waving Remus away.

He didn't take this as rejection, just as a "not now" sort of thing. Sighing, Remus stood from the mattress and stepped quickly to his own bed.

"Sleep well," he murmured into the night. This was, after all, the last day of their fifth year, and perhaps the last safe sleep Sirius would have until school started anew for the sixth.

**Author's Note: Going to be spending a fair amount of chapters on Year 6 of course. Hope it doesn't turn out like crap. Then again, this whole story (if you can call it that) is crap, so... yeah.**


	12. Chapter 12

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor, innuendo, mention of sexual situations (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 2 "You slept with ---? You don't even _like_ him/her!"

Chapter 12

After weeks upon weeks of enduring his mother pressuring him to go for her ideals, his brother Regulus bowing to those same whims like a puppy about to be praised (despite the fact that Sirius found that _odd_ given Regulus' reputation as a "neutral" Slytherin), and his father just not caring, Sirius was finally free. Seven weeks he'd been there, and with just shy of two left, he couldn't be happier to be away from the old Victorian house that acted as his family's summer home in London.

There was no place he'd rather be than spending the end of vacation at Potter Manor with James. At first the elder Potters had worried that Sirius should be spending his vacation with family, since he was away at school all year, but they caved in when Sirius and James had approached them with the idea at Diagon Alley in July. Orion Black acquiesced as well, simply not caring, before Walburga could get in any say.

Sirius ducked low to his broom as James whizzed by, going for the practice snitch that he had, well, _snitched_ from the school. "And he's going in close here folks! A left, a right, a stupendous dive stopped not five meters from the ground, aaaand – Prongsy has caught the snitch! England wins the World Cup!"

He had to duck again when James tried to cuff him. He didn't take it seriously though; James' grin was far too wide for _that_.

"Stuff it Padfoot; we both know I'm a chaser at heart," James waved his mussed up hair dramatically, as if he were the star of some muggle romance film.

"A _skirt_-chaser, maybe," but Sirius was flying away before James could offer up a proper response. There was probably a moment's pause and a growl before James sped after, but Sirius was too busy flying back to the Manor to care. Back in the neutral area – as in no playful-punching allowed – Sirius smirked at his scowling friend.

"I'll have you know that the only skirt I chase is Evans, and I'm only chasing until she realizes we were _made_ for each other," James scoffed. A fake gagging sound came from Sirius as he pretended to stick a finger down his throat, but it was rather ruined by the snickering. "Oi! And what right have you got to call m e a skirt-chaser anyway? You've gone to third base (1) with plenty of those bints at school."

"Home plate actually," another smirk as James gagged and managed to stammer out "who?" through his snack. "Dorcas Meadowes. You know, the blond 'Puff in our year, huge tits?"

"Yes I bloody well know who -" James paused and shook his head. "Not the point! But... _Merlin_, you slept with Meadowes? You don't even like her!"

"Liked her well enough back in June," he smirked. A minute later James was grumbling about guys not appreciating girls well enough, but Sirius was just fine with that. They were _teenagers_ for Circe's sake! They were supposed to have fun and get some experience; it was James' own fault that he was pinning all his hopes on Evans.

Soon conversation turned to far safer topics, and Sirius wondered how much longer he would be able to just have these sorts of conversations without worrying about Voldemort or his family or anything.

It was a sobering thought, but just like every other that he'd had over the years, he kept it inside. His friends would be happy, even if it meant keeping his own pain hidden.

**Author's Note: Thought the story could do with some more light-heartedness... and James. 'Cause he kinda wins. Epically. Still Imminence-blocked, but if I'm not at least sorta-cured by the end of the week, I'm going to force out chapter seven. I've done it before, damn it, and I can do it again!**

**On a side note, this story should be done by the time I'm out for Spring vacation (if I remember correctly, it's the week of March 22nd). Considering the chapters are so damn short and I'm almost a third of the way through, it shouldn't be too hard.**

**Oh, and just a reminder, I'm female. Just 'cause I tend to write from the male perspective (okay, only time I DIDN'T was my Gai/Fem!Kakashi I posted the other day) doesn't mean I'm male. I'm merely rather familiar with the male perspective (I think).  
**

(1) For those who do not know, the base system goes as follows: First is kissing, second is groping, third is hand-jobs/oral, and home is actual sex. I actually looked this up on Wikipedia for you all. (Though I like xkcd's explanation better.)


	13. Chapter 13

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor, innuendo, mention of sexual situations (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quotes used are number 10 "Did you hear? They're dating! How absurd!"

Chapter 13

"Did you hear? They're dating! How absurd!" Remus had heard many such exclamations throughout the week, but he really didn't find it all strange. Maybe it was because many people seemed to think of him as asexual – just because he didn't advertise his sex life didn't make that the truth though.

James, meanwhile, grinned. "Moony, if I'd know you had your eyes set on Fenwick, I'd have made sure you two hooked up sooner!"

But of course he wouldn't tell them he was interested in Benjy Fenwick, because to be honest he wasn't. Benjy was a seventh year Ravenclaw, one of Remus' regular cupboard-buddies, and certainly not a bad looking bloke. His dirty-blond hair was short and spiky, and he had chocolate brown eyes that shone warmly. There had really been no way to say no when Benjy asked him to the first Hogsmeade weekend.

Unlike James' assumption though, Remus hadn't had his eyes set on Benjy though, not in the least bit. They both viewed the other as a good release of sexual tension and nothing more, and to say that the person who now frequented Remus' dreams was blond... well, that was _far_ from the truth.

He was plenty content to just hang out with the unwitting object of his desires and snog Benjy though, and Benjy understood perfectly since he had a similar situation. Having unresolved lust for one's best friend was a hard thing to deal with.

**Author's Note: The pun was intentional. Just another thing to show a real progression; Sirius will no more be Remus' first experience than he will be Sirius'. And having a crush on your best friend, no matter their gender or your own, is _awkward_.  
**

**Still no Imminence-piration (pronounce it out loud to get it), but whatever. I intend to keep up the updates here, write a third part to the Target series, and the second chapter of Nan Gatsu, **_**and**_** a Valentines Day fic by the end of the week... social suicide much? Keep in mind that I also have my own life and schoolwork to attend to... bah, whatever.**


	14. Chapter 14

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor, innuendo, mention of sexual situations, violence (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quotes used are numbers 24 'She punched him.' and 38 "We are perfectly aligned – except for the fact that she hates me."

Chapter 14

Sirius had long since learned that innocuous days were the most chaotic. If they didn't make _themselves_ chaotic, then the Marauders would take matters into their own hands, damn the consequences, and probably end up in detention with Professor Slughorn or McGonagall for stopping the monotony from becoming contagious. In the opinion of the four male Gryffindor sixth years, their efforts ought to be applauded... not so much by the teachers, however.

However, this innocuous day was like any other in that it really wasn't innocuous except for its complete non-innocuity. The rest of the Marauders had given Sirius strange looks for this, not that he blamed them.

Anyone accusing Sirius of making sense should be summarily hung from the Whomping Willow.

Most of the other Marauders found the day eventful enough without Sirius' intervention, and told him so afterwards, but he didn't much care. Sure, he _kind_ of regretted it, but... well, he was getting off track in his thinking, wasn't he? Shaking his head much like he was prone to do in animagus form, Sirius grinned doggedly at his friends.

Remus and Peter both held back snickers while James glared with the eye that _didn't_ have raw dragon flesh pressed to it. He had quite a shiner, and it really was Sirius' fault, but... well, he could _hardly_ be blamed, right?

As previously stated, the day hadn't been as innocuous as what usually called for outside action. The Marauders had been studying... well, okay, not so much. They were in the library, Remus was sitting with Fenwick (who really wasn't good enough for the werewolf, but hardly anyone _could_ be) who was simultaneously stripping Remus with his eyes and quizzing him for a Transfigurations test the next day. Ravenclaws probably got off on studying, or maybe they just knew what books had the best porn? Sirius didn't really want to know. Peter was studying for the test, subtly hanging off of Fenwick and Remus' every word, Sirius was watching everyone, and James was watching Evans from across the library as she seemed to be having a row with Snape.

Not that Evans fighting with Snape was uncommon; ever since the OWLs, they had quit being friends, and Sirius had simply dismissed the whole affair. Considering it was November now, there was plenty of time for them to part ways, but neither seemed quite as willing to let go of their previous friendship as they tried to make it appear. It only took one comment for Sirius to convince James into intervening for his own entertainment.

"You know, I always thought Snivellus might be sweet on Evans."

That was all it took, and suddenly James was across the library, quick as a snitch, and "protecting" the redhead from a certain greasy-haired git who will remain unnamed.

Evans' response?

She punched him, though she didn't break his glasses – thank Merlin for Unbreakable Charms - which is what landed the Marauders in the infirmary with a dragon-steak while Pomfrey badgered Professor Slughorn for some Bruise Balm. "To keep down the swelling" she said, but Sirius thought it was more "to keep on smelling." Thus why Remus and Peter were snickering.

"I thought I was helping," Sirius said in his own defense; James rolled his one eye and flinched since he'd obviously moved the other as well. "Once you get your chance with Evans, you'll stop this whole 'only girl for me' tripe." It was an old argument that James didn't even _try_ to pursue anymore.

"Right," a single derisive snort. "We're perfectly aligned – except for the fact that she hates me."

Sirius gave his perpetually bed-headed friend speculative glance. "Yeah, there is that."

His bluntness was rewarded with a pillow to the face.

**Author's Note: I fully see the irony behind Sirius starting the fight between Severus and Lily (sort of) and then getting James involved in it like that. I'll try to get another of these out tonight, since I'll only manage 1 tomorrow (not getting home 'til after curfew, so...)  
**


	15. Chapter 15

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor, innuendo, mention of sexual situations (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 20 "He threw a vase at ---'s head."

Chapter 15

He felt betrayed or angry or... Merlin, Remus didn't even know what he felt. He chest was constricting tightly, so tightly that he was sure he was going to die, and his stomach had already rebelled, forcing him to expel the meager meal he'd had in the Infirmary before being taken to the shack. Everything was just so... he didn't even know.

There was the scent of – _fleshbloodsaltcopperlifeFOOD_ – a human, and then clearer – _slugsgrassairFREEDOMblood_ – and clearer still – _snakeflowers__PREY__parchmentinkfumesoil__FOOD_ – until it had become too much and what little awareness Remus possessed in his lupine form had faded away.

After that, everything was blurs. A dark shape, screams, a loud clatter, _pain_, and more and more _pain_, but Merlin Remus couldn't handle it. He was naked on the floor of the Shrieking Shack and he hadn't been hurt like this on the full moon in over a year now, had he?

He could feel scratches and bruises and all manner of things that he hadn't woken up to in ages. At home, his father could always feed him a sleeping potion that would at least make the wolf drowsy, and the Marauders would keep Moony busy, but neither had occurred…

Hurried steps on hard wood made his head pound, and Madame Pomfrey's sharp voice, never the first he heard anymore, cut his eardrums to shreds. She was saying… something. Remus couldn't make sense of the sounds, instead giving into his baser desire to curl up, even as his cuts itched at the movement. The sudden wash of cool healing magic allowed him to uncurl, the scratches having sealed – though by no means healed – and his headache abated somewhat.

"It's so terrible what happened," Pomfrey sighed as she gathered him up to dress him. "And now you're injured like you haven't been in months! But... no, I'm sure the Headmaster won't... but never you mind, Mr Lupin! You're on bed rest as soon as we get to the castle; I'll postpone the verdict until you're well enough at least." The robe was airy, but it still made him want to scream, as if he were wearing the coarsest of materials, and it rubbed him in places that couldn't have existed before this moment.

Almost unaware, he barely noticed as he was disillusioned and levitated back to school.

He hadn't realized he'd fallen asleep, but when he did, Remus felt a lot more aware and less hyper-aware. No longer was every sensation overruling his mind, and he focused on the hushed voices of the Marauders, all speaking angrily to one another. Strange, because though they did argue, it was never at his bedside.

However, there wasn't a single word he could make out until the Headmaster spoke.

"No one is going to be expelled," an angry shout from James was cut off by Dumbledore's cool, almost dangerous voice. "However, both Mr Black and Mr Snape will be serving detention. Severus, you will be working with Professor Slughorn for the next week. Sirius, you will serve a month of detention with Mr Filch. _That is all_." The tone of finality there almost made Remus jump. "Now, I believe Mr Lupin is wondering what we are speaking of. I will leave that to you. Good evening."

The soft, almost whispery, slap of leather boot-sole on the Hospital Wing's stone floor petered off slowly until Remus decided that he was in no danger by opening his eyes. So he did.

James looked like he was completely furious, and was sending the darkest glare imaginable at Sirius. It was absolutely _not_ normal. Sirius, meanwhile, looked ashamed, yet determined, and kept his eyes far from his friends. Peter glanced between all three nervously, at a complete loss as to what to do.

And then James was explaining in feverish tones the complete stupidity of Sirius' actions. How Sirius had told Snape to check out the Whomping Willow if he really wanted to know what they were up to. Suddenly the onslaught of strangling emotion from that morning made sense, and he could only listen in horror as the tale was told.

How James had barely arrived in time to stop Remus from tearing Snape to pieces.

How he had immediately taken Sirius and Snape to Dumbledore.

How he had been so sure that Remus would be expelled for attempted murder, never mind that he wasn't in his right mind, and worrying all night for Remus' well being.

How Sirius hadn't even said _sorry_.

The worst was that, as soon as James started telling Remus all of this, Sirius simply left the room, not looking back once.

Remus was discharged from the Hospital Wing next morning, and when he saw Sirius in the common room, he might have gone insane, he wasn't sure. He was just lucky the wolf didn't take over.

He threw a vase at Sirius' head.

No one outside of James and Peter were brave enough to approach him after.

**Author's Note: I'm aware that, canonically, the Whomping Willow Debacle happened in their ****fifth**** year, but it has always made more sense to me that it would happen in 6th year, especially since I don't think James would persist in attacking Snape for fun after saving his life, nor would Remus get over Sirius' betrayal to **_**let**_** them so soon. Much like many fanfic authors, I find canon illogical. And I already said that 6th year takes up a good chunk, so... yeah.**

**Sorry about not posting this sooner, but I haven't been on the internet since Tuesday. So... yeah.**


	16. Chapter 16

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor, innuendo, mention of sexual situations (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 15 "You left me when I needed you most. How can you justify that?"

Chapter 16

Sirius had kept to himself for as long as possible. Dumbledore gave him a token punishment, that much was obvious, because he knew the real punishment for his actions was the complete and total _ache_ that made his heart clench at the mere sight of his friends.

His ex-friends.

There was a reason behind what he had done, and it wasn't just standard teen idiocy like James thought, or another step to the rivalry with Snape like Peter thought. It was because of his parents. They hadn't made him do it. They didn't even know that Sirius' best friend on the face of the Earth was a werewolf. No, they didn't even know they played a part in the demise of the Marauders, but Sirius just couldn't stop himself, not really.

Because he needed their acceptance. He needed his parents to love him the way they loved Regulus and the way they used to love him, too. Things hadn't been the same since he was Sorted, but Sirius had ignored it because that was all he could do.

But now things had escalated, and he couldn't take it. He needed them. There was no replacement in the world for a parent's love, not even from James' parents. While they treated him as part of the family, that treatment was no replacement for the small, stiff smiles his mothers used to give or a pat on the back from his father.

And all because of _that_ he had betrayed Remus, the one person he swore to never betray... Merlin what had he _done_? They were family, but the Marauders weren't. The Marauders shouldn't... but no. Sirius had done what he had done, and there was no excusing it.

After all was said and done, Sirius never regretted anything more than what happened that night. It wasn't until after the fact that he realized it hurt more to have James glare at him and to see Remus in the Hospital bed, looking so confused, than it had even to hear his mother voice her disappointment in him.

_In the end, I really am a blood traitor, just like Mum said,_ Sirius' thoughts curled in on themselves as he stared at the canopy of his bed. _All my bloody fault_.

The door creaked open. It had been a week since it happened, six days since Sirius had barely ducked the vase thrown at him. He wouldn't have ducked if it hadn't just been from instinct though, because he deserved it. Sirius hadn't seen Remus once since then, making sure to get to bed early, wake earlier, and eat in the kitchens.

It was a testament to how little any of his friends wanted to see him that they didn't just use the Map to find him.

"Sirius," and gods, wasn't _that_ voice another knife in his heart? Remus pulled back Sirius' bed hangings, and the Grim animagus could still see the angry shimmer in his eyes. But he held his friend's gaze. "We need to talk."

"What's there to talk about? I'm a pureblood, a Black," never had his name tasted so damned _acidic_. "Shouldn't you have expected this from the beginning."

"But the thing is, you _aren't_ a Black," Remus' glare was so hard that Sirius didn't dare argue. "You're Sirius Padfoot Marauder; that's how you signed into the pact and that's who you are to us. We're pack." Remus never used werewolf terminology, certainly not so casually. It made everything seem that much more grave. "But... you left me when I needed you most. How do you justify that?"

"I already said -"

"You already said _Hippogriff shit_," Remus' fist hit one of the posts solidly and left quite a dent in the wood. Now Sirius was actually afraid of his friend, something that hadn't happened in a long time. Remus was silent, trying to calm himself down from the look of things, but spoke soon enough. "I'm too riled up still to try talking to you. And I sure as hell haven't forgiven you yet... but I'll get James to lay off."

"You don't -"

"I know, but I _want_ to," Remus' golden irises burned into Sirius retina, or so it seemed. "When I'm calm enough to talk and you are actually willing to talk, then we'll talk. Just don't... don't do what you and I talked about last year, okay?"

Sirius knew immediately that Remus was talking about the whole Death Eater thing, and even though he wanted to be the villain in this situation, he nodded.

Remus left, and Sirius collapsed, completely and utterly defeated, but not destroyed.

**Author's Note: Wow... I haven't written this in a month... that's what I get for losing my notebook though. Here is chapter 16. I'll write more later. Oh, and my Imminence Block? Gone!**

**:D**


	17. Chapter 17

Warnings: Slash, crude language, adult humor, innuendo, mention of sexual situations (might add more warnings later)

Disclaimers: Harry Potter belongs to JKR and affiliates, of which I am not one. Written for L'amoureuse "50 Phrases Challenge" on HPFC. Quote used is number 29 "After drinking the potion, he fell on the floor writhing in pain."

Chapter 17

It had been a week, Remus realized suddenly, since he had confronted Sirius. He had let himself be angry for a few days, because he knew there was a reason behind Sirius' actions; to be honest, the fact that there was a reason made it hurt a lot more than when Remus had managed to trick himself into thinking there wasn't.

That Sirius wouldn't trust him with that reason made it all the worse.

Remus was patient, however. He knew that until all his ill will towards Sirius had receded, that he should wait to hear the explanation. It was obviously something very important, else he wouldn't have done it, and more than that, it must have been a reason that would hurt Remus more than the action.

It was so sobering, and it made Remus wish more than ever that he hadn't ever had anything to do with Sirius Black. He was in deep, and despite Benjy, the crush had not abated, only strengthened.

That was probably why Benjy had broken it off with him that day, but Remus really didn't mind. They were a release for one another, because Sirius Black and Arnold Meyer were both the straight male best friends to two gay men who loved their straight male best friend too much for their own damned good. Of course, several girls had been eavesdropping in library at the time, when Benjy told Remus that it was over, and they had immediately taken Remus' side, but since Remus wasn't even on Remus' side, it was pointless.

It was getting late though. Sirius had one of his detentions with Filch, though a late one, and Remus decided that it was finally time for answers. Maybe. He wasn't sure, really, but if Sirius could bring himself to say it, than more power to him.

But that wasn't why Remus was staring at Sirius' bed... no, he wasn't thinking dirty thoughts – he was too worried for that, strange to say – but rather at what lay on it. A package had been dropped there some hours ago by an owl that had left without even looking at the three boys who had all still been awake at the time.

For some unknown reason, Remus was _curious_ about it. Which made him wonder why he was curious, and therefore more curious than ever before.

Later, his actions would be blamed on Remus being a Gryffindor, never mind a reasonable and forward thinking one. After all, Sirius didn't have any real friends outside of the Marauders, despite the many female (and some male) admirers who liked to think otherwise, and the owls of Sirius' admirers didn't have such serious owls as that one had been.

Finding a potion inside the package was even more interesting.

The label didn't say what it was, but it had a message written in spindly cursive, elegant and swooping over the small slip of paper.

"_For Moony_"

He didn't know _why_ he drank it, didn't know what made his hand pull out the stopper, or forced the other to raise to ice cold glass to his lips. There was no conscious thought involved, only some drive, like an instinct, that made him down the entire phial in one go.

After drinking the potion, he fell on the floor writhing in pain.

**Author's Note: Yeah... in the original placement I was going to have Sirius drink a potion at home and have Regulus save him or something, but this seemed so much more dramatic. Next chapter should be out sooner than this one was...**


End file.
